Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Clinical Depression

With the life threatening illness I face
It's become a terrible place
It's a depression easily misunderstood
When I am in it, it's not very good
It's much worse than the seasonal kind
It's a much darker place in my mind
When you lose a loved one, it's not like that
It's a place where nobody should be at

I have no zest for life, no will to live
My energy is gone, I have nothing to give
It takes control of everything I do
Its darker than the darkest blue

Normal decisions that I usually make
Are the hardest ones that I must take
People don't understand, they say go for walk
They say play some music, but I just can't talk
I want to tell them I have no will, leave me alone
It's the worst place to be, that I have ever known

People think I can get out of it easily, just change the mood
Those kind of people have the wrong kind of attitude
Think of it this way, you're born with love of light
But how would you feel if it was as dark as night

The only thing that I can do, is wait until it is done
Ride it out, and when it is over I shall see the sun
Those thoughts don't come when I am in that dark place
It's like I am alone way out there in outer space

I wouldn't wish this kind of depression onto any soul
Because when I have it, I just don't feel whole
I have it, so I know what it is like to be
In a dark place, I just don't feel like me
©Nov 29, 2015 Bud Lemire
                         Author Note:
Clinical Depression is the worst kind of depression
you can have. It is a dark place to be. Not even music
can lift you out. Nothing can. You just have to ride it
out and wait until you come out of it. Like a lost soul
in a place that is so dark, until the light surrounds you
once again.

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