Sunday, December 1, 2013

We Receive What We Need

Over the last couple of months my thoughts have been more on what I have been missing in my life. When my granddaughter Sarah passed away at the tender young age of 4 ½ years old, my life and my heart changed forever. She was very special little girl, one of God’s special messengers. Many times I have thanked God for such a beautiful soul, and to be a part of her short life was such a blessing.

Although Sarah was special needs she was the most beautiful loving little angel. Just the way God created her! She was forever in my arms, almost like a part of my body. She spent hours being held by my left arm, nestled on my hip. I loved and valued every single second. There were times that I could feel our hearts beating as one. Then and only then did I truly understood what unconditional love was and how it felt. I would have moved mountains for her. I loved my children with every ounce of my soul, but this was somehow different. Sarah was surrounded with love always. During those times I would have sold my soul to protect her and keep her safe, and forever in Grand-Moms arms.

After the passing of Sarah, my arms ached because of the emptiness. The emotions kept pulling my heart strings. Each passing day eased the tension on the heart strings. But the ache never subsided or lessened.

Slowly years passed and the ache softened, but the emptiness in my arms was still painful. That is when I decided that I would ask the universe for to fill the emptiness I was feeling in my heart and arms. I prayed God and the universe to fill my arms with someone to love. A special someone that I could give and receive unconditional love that I so desired.

Weeks, months pasted nothing happened. So I kept asking the universe for assistance. Each time I asked the same thing over and over again. Each time I asked I knew the universe heard me, so why was there no answer? I kept asking and believing that my prayers would be answered.

One day as I was walking out to my car I notice this little dog cold and lost. To myself I was thinking that the poor baby was shivering and cold, I wondered who might have lost such a little cutie. While standing there watching him I tried to call him over to me. There was no way he was coming over to me, a stranger. My thoughts went to God and I asked him to help me so that I might help him. Then I heard, “Kay Kneel” so I replied ok …and knelt. Ever so slowly the little doggie started to approach in my direction. Move to get more comfortable as I knelt I was told “Be still my child”. So I waited which seemed like forever because I was freezing! I could only imagine how if I was freezing what little one was feeling.

Finally the little dog jumped into my lap and started licking my face. Instinctively I wrapped my little jacket around him and carried him in my arms as we headed towards home. I could feel him shivering under my jacket. Poor little guy had no tags or nothing to say where he belonged. Right now he needed warmth and some food.

After he settled in we started looking for his possible owner. I knew that I could only help find his forever home. We went searching for clues where he was from? Who were his owners? What happened to the little guy?

I contacted a rescue group to help find him a loving home. The rescue group paid for him to receive shots and checked him for heart worms, Major is healthy, up to date and ready for his new life. Somewhere along the way Major decided he was going to be my doggie. And the little stinker started spending time in my lap, following me around like my shadow.

One evening while watching T.V. with my new lap buddy, I had an awe moment. My prayers had been answered. Not The way I had expected but, indeed they were answered. When I was sending out my prayers to the universe, I was thinking my twin flame. The man of my dreams! A two legged man! Someone that I could love unconditionally for time and eternity.

After laughing to myself I realized, what the universe had done. They sent exactly what I asked for, someone that would love me unconditionally. Thank you for my four legged buddy, Major!

Although I knew this was only temporary and kept telling myself do not get attached, do not get attached. But, my heart said you do not have a choice we are taking the plunge! Yes I fell for the little guy and realized how much when one lady said she wanted to give him a new home. I cried like a baby asking God why would you do this? Why do I have to give him up? Why?

The response I received was “You have been entrusted with some very precious souls. Each one that will come to you needs you as much as you need them. Love them my child, love them.”

©2013 Kay Roy Jones

Click on Kay Roy Jones for bio and list of other works published by Pencil Stubs Online.

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